Obituary, a Template

Not sure if the same is true in your hometown, but every obituary in the San Antonio Express News for a white woman over 65 looks just about the same. It’s like there’s a template.

–

[Name], a loving and generous

Key life role:

☐ wife

☐ mother

☐ daughter

☐ grandmother

Method of Being Called to the Lord:

and faithful Christian was called home on [date], 

☐ suddenly, into the arms of Jesus.

☐ peacefully, into the arms of Jesus.

Birth:

[Name] was born in [town], [southern state] on [date] to [mother’s name] and [father’s name].

High School Resting Laurels:

[Name] is a proud graduate of [high school name], where she was 

☐ a cheerleader.

☐ on the honor roll.

☐ the dance team captain.

College, Sorority, and Method of Husband Acquisition:

She later attended and graduated from [college name], where she was a member of the [circle one: Pi Beta Phi, Kappa Alpha Theta, Chi Omega, Kappa Kappa Gamma, Delta Delta Delta] sorority. It was in college that [Name] met her husband [first name] on a blind date. They were married for [number] loving years and blessed with [number] children.

Pre-Child Work Stint:

After college, [Name] worked briefly as a [circle one: nurse, teacher, secretary], and then dedicated her life to being a devoted wife, mother, and servant of God.

Socially Appropriate Community Involvement:

[Name] was a lifelong member of [country club name], [charitable organization benefiting children], and [church guild name]. She also enjoyed her time as a docent for [local museum].

Preceded in Death:

She was preceded in death by her loving husband [name], and her parents [male name] and [female name].

Survived by:

She is survived by her children

☐ son: [first and last name] and his lovely wife [first name] 

☐ daughter: [first name] and her successful husband [first name and last name]

and her grandchildren [list of precious names, with boys’ names ending in -on or -en and girls’ names ending in -y or -ie].

Life Priorities:

[Name] devoted her life to God, her husband, her children, the many friends she made through her church life, and community involvement. 

Though [Name] had some interests outside the home, her role as the consummate homemaker was what her loved ones most appreciated. 

Shout-Out to Person Who Did All of the Work:

The family would like to thank [female first name] for her loving care during the last years of [Name’s] life.

Services:

Services will take place on [time and date] at [name of Methodist, Presbyterian, Episcopal, Lutheran, Baptist, or evangelical church of trendy name].

Donations:

In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to [Christian camp name].